The Power of Buyer’s Remorse: Empowering Kids Through Valuable Lessons
The Power of Buyer’s Remorse: Empowering Kids Through Valuable Lessons
Buyer’s remorse is a common feeling experienced by individuals after making a purchase, often characterized by a sense of regret or dissatisfaction. You know you’ve been there! It’s not a great feeling, but it can be an amazing learning experience, especially for kids. While it may seem counterintuitive, allowing kids to experience buyer’s remorse can be a valuable life lesson that fosters resilience, grit, and important decision-making skills. The book Value Creation Kid: The healthy struggles your kid needs to succeed does a great job of highlighting how to put this idea into action. We live in a world of instant gratification and impulse buying, so it’s more important than ever to teach our kids to navigate the emotions associated with buyer’s remorse in a healthy way.
Situations where buyers remorse can impact your kids for the better
1. Impulse purchasing -
Your kid goes to a local fair with the family. They came across a stall selling unique hats. They get caught up in the moment and impulsively purchase a neon-green, oversized cowboy hat. At first, they are excited about the purchase. But quickly realize that the hat is cumbersome and that they don't want to wear it anymore. They ask to return the hat, but because that isn’t an option, they now have the opportunity to grapple with the feelings of disappointment and rethink their choices. This process means that next time they are way more likely to think ahead and maybe make a better decision about where to spend their money.
2. Falling victim to false advertising -
Your kid sees an advertisement on TV showcasing a magical doll that can talk, sing, and even dance. They decide to spend their money on the doll and convince you to take them to the toy store that same day, they absolutely cannot wait! They purchase the doll and bring it home, only to find out that it only mutters a few pre-recorded phrases. It didn’t sing or dance. That was all just an illusion from the commercial. They are crushed that she spent her money on something that didn’t do what they thought it would. Now you have the opportunity to have a conversation with them about what they thought the item would be vs how it is, and how next time you can do research together to make sure it is exactly what they want before making the purchase.
3. Cheaply made and breaks quickly -
You’re in a toy store and your kid's gaze lands on a gleaming, high-speed race car, and they can’t resist the temptation. They decide to grab their GravyStack card and spend their hard-earned money on it, but as soon as they get it home, the car breaks. If that were your money that bought it, they would feel sad their toy was broken, but wouldn’t look for solutions and wouldn’t have motivation to choose more wisely next time. Because it is their money, now this event means more to them, and they will learn more from it rather than just experiencing temporary sadness.
4. Purchasing because it’s the newest fad and everyone has it -
Your teen is captivated by the newest technology craze - a 3D printing pen. They know they want one because all of their friends have one. They spend their hard-earned money on one, so they could fit in with their peers. They enjoy it for a few days and then realize that it’s not as exciting as they thought it would be. They become disappointed that they spent their money on something they only wanted because their friends had one. This provides you with the perfect opportunity to start a conversation with them about their motivations for purchasing items. You can guide them to ask themselves questions before making another purchase of a fad item. They can ask themselves, “Why do I want to buy this item? What about this item makes me excited?” Thinking about these questions will help them be more intentional with their money in the future.
5. Hidden Expenses -
Your teen loves playing video games, so when they see a new flashy gaming console at the mall they can’t resist buying it. Without a second thought, they use all of their money to purchase it, driven by the allure of an immersive gaming experience. However, as they excitedly set up the gaming system at home, they realize that their TV isn’t compatible with the console, leaving them unable to play. Now they have some hidden expenses in order to use their new gaming console - which they totally love and don’t regret. These new hidden expenses are a new TV that’s compatible, maybe faster internet, and possibly a new controller. They now have to save up more money to use their new item. You can have a conversation with them about doing a little research before making a big purchase to ensure they have all of the expenses covered.
How important are these lessons?
Buyer’s remorse provides an opportunity for kids to learn from their mistakes. And let’s be honest, those can be the best kinds of lessons because the kids relate to them.
1. Learning now to avoid consequences later:
One of the fundamental lessons buyer’s remorse offers is the real-life experience of financial and emotional consequences. Because they are still kids, the sting of regret and the lack of funds in their bank account have important, but safely limited consequences. Letting them experience this and learn from it now helps them avoid bigger consequences later when the results could mean missing rent or even bankruptcy.
2. Developing Financial Responsibility:
Experiencing buyer’s remorse can also be an excellent opportunity to introduce kids to the concept of financial responsibility. When kids spend their own money, feeling regret after a purchase can prompt discussions about budgeting, saving, and setting priorities for spending. They can learn to weigh the value of their purchases against their financial goals, which enables them to make more informed decisions in the future.
3. Building Resilience and Coping Skills:
While buyer’s remorse can be emotionally challenging, it can also provide a chance for kids to build resilience and develop coping skills. When kids face disappointment, they learn to navigate their feelings, reflect on their choices, and find ways to move forward. This process helps them develop emotional intelligence and adaptability, which are crucial skills that contribute to their overall well-being as they grow older.
4. Encouraging Problem-Solving and Creativity:
The experience of buyer's remorse can stimulate problem-solving abilities and creative thinking. Parents can help by encouraging their kids to find alternative uses for the item they regret purchasing or by helping them brainstorm ways to minimize the impact of their decision. This can foster their resourcefulness and imaginative abilities. By doing so, they discover that even in moments of regret, there are opportunities to learn, adapt, and find solutions.
The one big mistake most parents make
When kids don’t make and manage their own money, without their parents' direct intervention, kids don’t fully grasp the lessons that come with buyer’s remorse. And no, their weekly allowance doesn’t count as them making money.
When kids use their own hard-earned money, whether from doing Gigs or traditional jobs, to make purchases, they develop a deeper appreciation for the value of money. It allows them to experience the consequences of impulse decisions firsthand and understand the importance of researching, comparing options, and making thoughtful choices. By experiencing a variety of purchases, both satisfying and disappointing, kids gain a broader perspective on the impact of their spending decisions, fostering financial literacy and cultivating a sense of responsibility.
Ultimately, it is through the process of earning and spending their own money that children truly internalize the lessons of buyer’s remorse and make more informed choices in the future.
How do kids earn money if they aren’t old enough to get a job yet?
GravyStack provides kids with the chance to earn money through the home economy created by the 3E’s - expectations, expenses, and extra pay. This highlights what kids are expected to do without pay, what they are expected to pay for themselves, and provides them with opportunities to earn extra money through completing Gigs - both in their home and in the community. Through the use of this 3E’s home-based economy, kids have the experience of earning money and spending it on different items. This increases their chances of encountering the positive benefits of buyer’s remorse and learning from these mistakes early on.
While it may be tempting to shield our kids from disappointment, empowering children to make some mistakes and learn from emotional consequences like buyer’s remorse can set them on a path towards making informed decisions and leading fulfilling lives. By granting our kids early exposure to the invaluable lessons of buyer’s remorse, during a time when the consequences are minor yet educational, we equip them with the necessary tools to embark on their personal journeys toward financial success.
